December 15, 2009

Brain Diarrhea

randomtuesday
Which is another way of saying random thoughts but I thought I would be little creative and quite frankly, anything that has to do with poop soup gets people's attention.

Right?

Speaking of poop soup, it is a regular topic of conversation in my home. Please tell me that bowel movements and toots are regularly discussed in your home too. My children have learned creative ways to inform us of their upcoming bathroom events.

"Mom, I am going to lay a turd"
"I have to pee out of my bum"

This is my life.
And you wonder why I talk about drinking so often.

My son told me that I would be prettier if I had pink hair.
I am considering it.

He also said I should paint my toenails purple.
I might.

I am fascinated by other humans. I could sit on a bench and observe them all day every day. I am especially fascinated by old people who stop {in front of me} in the middle of very busy aisles during the Christmas season to pick up a penny.

Then when I almost ram them in the behind with my cart, they give me dirty looks.

That penny wouldn't bring them much luck when they get hit from behind with a shopping cart would it?

I am totally grossed out by hormonal young humans fondling each other in public places. Does that age me? There is no need for me to see them cupping bum cheeks and kissing with the tongue. Eww.

I have actually considered offering them my children for an hour so they can see what all that fondling leads to.

Yes, I really think that way.

Three faucets in my home smell like rotten eggs when I turn the water on. I refuse to use those faucets when I have people in my home because I am scared that they might think I have ...ummm.....tummy issues.

Yes, I really stress about that.

Maybe I should just call the plumber.


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13 comments:

Design it Chic said...

Yeah probably the plumber should do the trick.. and after that.. you can send him my way too, mmmkay?:)
Happy Tuesday! Here's my Randomness too:)

Kat said...

PDA at any age grosses me out.

The Maven said...

I'm a people watcher, too. It's one of the few things I'm good at.

And talk of bodily functions? Dude. I have THREE BOYS. That's about all we talk about here. Le sigh.

WackyMummy said...

This made me laugh. Thanks. =) I needed it. Go find out why: http://wackymummy.blogspot.com/2009/12/modern-christmas-carol.html

Julie@Momspective said...

I actually had a similar poo conversation and then declared that I'm dying my hair purple today lol. I doubt I will though. Maybe. Hmm....

CaJoh said...

My wife is a people watcher. She tends to imagine what they do for a living which makes me feel poor, so I avoid doing it.

Please don't talk about sinks, we had our share of kitchen-sink gate last year and I don't want to revisit it again this year.

Thank you for your randomness,

Otter Thomas said...

I love the idea of giving your kids to hormonal teens. That should be a tactic in class at high school.

Elaine A. said...

There's a lot of poop/fart talk around here too. I guess it's better than other stuff they could be saying.

I am Harriet said...

Pee out my bum is a new one for me :)
Have a great day!
http://iamharriet.blogspot.com/2009/12/do-we-need-santa-speedo-run-in-boston.html

Foursons said...

Are you sure your water is safe to drink?

And teenage lovebirds gross me out too. Eeeewwww!

Amy@Bitchin'WivesClub said...

As the mother of three boys and the regrettable recipient of bad genes that make my GI system a source of constant frustration....

I get it. ;)

Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog said...

Hmmmm... Yes, I think you're getting older if that is really bugging you. :) Sorry!

Then again, once my kids are teens, it will DEFINITELY bother ME...

Jenners said...

I would say that 5 out of 10 conversations in our house concern tooting, farting, peeing or pooping. I am not exaggerating!