May 06, 2010

Dear New Mothers








Dear New Mothers,

I am a mother. To three children.

I have conquered the land of Infantdom. The land of no sleep and alot of crying.

I have conquered (twice) the unknown world of Toddlerhood. It was a rough place but we all got out alive. Now I am experiencing it again...with a girl, and if I make it out this time, I will consider my life a huge success.

I am currently making my way through the huge city of SchoolAgedville with two boys, and it could just prove to be the toughest place yet. I compare it to a dangerous crime-ridden city, where there is alot of attitude, bad words and violence. So far, I am making it through but we still have a long way to go.

Please pray for me.

As I have made my way through these deep, dark unknown destinations, I have learned alot. So I wanted to share my findings with you newbies close to buckling in and going for the drive yourselves.

First of all, I am praying for you. Praying that you get sleep, get help from others, take time for yourself and I am praying that you soak it all in. Try your hardest to remember the moments.

After coming home from the hospital, you may feel euphoric. You have just pushed a human being out of your vajayjay so you should be very proud of yourself. It was a huge accomplishment. Your milk likely hasn't come in yet so get one last look at "The Twins" before they become painful and engorged. They will never again look large and perky. Kiss those days goodbye girlfriend. Before long they will look like deflated balloons.

Secondly, you are probably very tired. Exhausted is a better word actually. Well, get used to it because you will not sleep again for the next 18 years. Sorry to rain on your "Yay is Me Parade" but a full nights sleep will not exist until your children are grown and out of the house. But by that time you will be middle aged and not sleeping due to hot flashes and bowel issues, so, well...........yeah, that's life as a Mother.

Thirdly, everything you ingest, your new baby will ingest. If you drink coffee or soda, be prepared for an over-stimulated (also known as "wired") baby. If you drink milk, be prepared for many poop soup explosions (out of your baby, not you). If you like spicy food, GOOD LUCK with that. Let me know how it goes. So for the length of time you breastfeed, you will have to eat crackers, drink water and just look at tacos and burritos.

It is ok to cry. Hormones are raging throughout your body and your body is going haywire. Yell at your husband. It is ok. He will understand.

Your baby will cry alot. Usually during the night when everyone else is sleeping. Do what I did and cry too. Or eat chocolate. Alot of chocolate.

Remember the days of putting your shoes on and going out to the mall just for the heck of it? Those days are over. You will now need to get up before the sun rises to shower, eat breakfast, get dressed, get baby fed and dressed, pack a diaper bag, get baby in the car seat. Now cross your fingers and hope there arent any poop soup explosions because then you have to start all over....

Last but not least, bring baby into your bed, cry, eat chocolate and enjoy every possible second that he/she is this tiny, because it does not last long and you will miss it like crazy.

Love

*This post has been inspired by the prompts provided on Mamas Losin It*

11 comments:

myorii said...

Amen, Momma! Wow, you hit every single point right on the dot. Very good advice. Of course, it does make us wonder...with the pain we go through with a newborn, why is it that we are willing to do it all over again with more children? I guess maternal love does funny things to our heads, huh?

Life with Kaishon said...

This was a superb post! Love it! Love it! Love it : )

Great illustrations to go along with that timeless advice...
[poop soup : (]

WackyMummy said...

Yep, that's it. Motherhood also causes PTSD, right? Cuz I think I have it... must be all that crying... and loss of sleep... and bowel explosions...

Lo said...

Love it! (Though I could have lived without the reminder about the poop-soup explosions! LOL)

suzannah @ so much shouting/laughter said...

my second babe is six months and it's going so much faster!

those snuggly newborn naps are the very best:)

KLZ said...

Over from Mama Kat's...

And now I'm crying. Clearly, I'm still breastfeeding and my hormones are wacked but...I already miss it. I know, shoot me.

This was a perfect post.

Natalie said...

Oh! I wished I would've received this three years ago! You nailed everything a new mom needs to know down to a tee (especially the boobs after breastfeeding...bye bye!). Thank you for sharing. I'm in the midst of toddlerhood right now, and have 8 month old twins who will be there before I know it. I know you say I'll miss it...I'll just have to wait and see :)
Stopping by from Mama Kat's...

Foursons said...

Yup, I think you just about covered it. Except don't eat broccoli or califlower while nursing either.

Alicia aka MyBusyMind said...

Well stated, I love to see the different writings on the same prompts. Loving the blog

Alicia

Andrea (ace1028) said...

Love this. I did the same prompt, and have seen a few. So well said! :)

Jenners said...

That breastfeeding poster is so funny!

You speak the truth, funny lady. And I'm so old I may face the joys of menopause while having a teenager. That should be fun ... whose hormones will rage the most?