July 12, 2009

Parenting is for the Experts

Ok. Lets be honest.

Parenting isn't all chocolate with whipped cream on top.

Parenting sucks at times.

*gasp*

I know. I just said a very "non-mommy" thing to say because Mommy's are supposed to enjoy their children and all that comes along with raising their children. They should treasure every second they have with the babies that they created and carried for 9 months. They should cherish the time they have with their children because they aren't children for long.

But......

before they grow up to be independent men and women there is alot of "stuff" that happens.

Stuff like sleepless nights.....
having 30 minute tantrums because you wouldn't buy them a toy gun
cleaning up a carton of eggs dumped on the floor and then used as finger paint
violent fighting between siblings
cursing in front of your very religious grandparents
farting in church
peeing/pooping on the neighbour's lawn
being told that they hate you and you're mean approximately 79 times every day
being told that you're fat and they don't love you approximately 14 times every day

+ many, many other experiences that I have yet to live through.

I may not make it that long.

Really.

I am learning that this parenting thing does not get easier as your children get older. Yes, they can dress themselves and go to school for a few hours a day, but they also get smarter.

Smarter=knowing how to push buttons, sneakier, conniving

Scary huh?

Yes, it is.

Very.

Brushing their teeth turns into sticking a glob of toothpaste in their mouth and spitting it out so they have fresh breath and Mommy thinks their teeth are clean.

Going to bed means being quiet until Mommy and Daddy head into their bedroom and then quietly sneaking to the kitchen and grabbing a snack or two or three.

Wiping their nose means scrunching up a tissue and throwing it on the floor, then picking a greener and wiping it on the couch.

Throwing wrappers in the garbage means throwing it behind the door for Mommy and Daddy to find a day later.

And cleaning their bedroom means shoving every single item on their bedroom floor under their bed.

And my children are only 5, 7 and 1.

What will life be like when they are teenagers?

I am terrified.

Is there some sort of course I can take?

Because I need it.

ASAP.






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5 comments:

Heatherlyn said...

Hmmmm. My children are not quite so sneaky. I don't think. I might be wrong. Right now, my 6 year-old tells on herself all day long. But I don't mind. I hope that she does it when she is 16 too!

But I don't think any parent is prepared entirely to deal with little personalities that have their own agendas and perceptions. :) There may not be a class. Oh, I guess that there are classes. If you happen to take one, and it works, let me know. But I do think prayer and love helps. And chocolate. And if you can get a good night's sleep, that helps too. And so do dates away with your husband and no kids. :)

Jenny said...

I think I need that course too ;)

Jenn said...

I can't give any advice because I only have one so far and she is only 16 months old. If you find that course let me know though!

Jen said...

This post speaks volumes. People always ask me if the triplets are getting easier as they grow and my answer is HELL NO!
Ok, I don't say that but in a lot of ways being a parent gets harder as they grow older and older. Someday, I just wish for that simple, sleep deprived period of infancy. At least then, they couldn't talk and they stayed were I put them.

*sigh*

Jenners said...

Thank you for saying what every mom things but won't say out loud ... mothering is not a walk in the park ... it is more like a full-on combat experience with an opponent that changes tactics and morphs into different people with little or no warning. And they lull you into sense of well-being and then spring some kind of new odious behavior on you. Mothering is not for the weak!