October 30, 2011

Cutie and the Beast

Dudes.  Momma has some drama going on at her house.  Between a 6 month old cat {kitten} and a 2000 pound beast named Ike.
Drama=small cat thinks he can hang out and be all cool and stuff with the Beast. 
Thank goodness Momma is around to supervise the play dates and document it all.
Don't worry. No one was hurt and nothing was broken during the making of this soap opera.  Except my tummy because I laughed so much I almost peed my pants.

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Smokey: Hey, lets hang out
Ike: Get the F away from me before I stomp on your head

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S: C'mon. We could eat grass together. Just chat about life and women.
I: Dude. I am not your friend. Will never be your friend. My shits are three times the size of you. Get.Away.From.Me

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S: You're just a big, fat meanie. I will go be friends with Duke instead
I: DUKE IS MY FRIEND! STAY AWAY OR I WILL HURT YOU BAD, MO-FO!

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I: *stomp stomp*
S: MEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

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S: OK. If I let you smell my bum, will you hang out with me?
I: *stomp stomp stomp*

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S: I guess that is a no. Jerk.

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I: OK. Maybe just a little sniff

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S: OUCH! I didnt say to stick your nose up my butt hole so hard that it knocks me off of my feet. Geesh. The things we do to make friends.

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Blackie {the other cat}: Don't worry Smokey, I will save you!
Now Ike, I am such a nasty, mean cat that I refuse to participate in any social activities with Smokey. He is lonely and just needs a friend to talk to. Do me a favour and be his friend so I can go sleep in peace.

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S: I love you Ike. Please be my friend. I promise to stop peeing in your stall and pooping in your field. Pretty please.

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I: OK. Maybe it will be fun to have another friend to eat grass with. To shit with. To roll in the dirt with.

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S: Nah. I cant take the rejection anymore, Ike. I'm leaving you for Blackie the cat instead. Thanks anyways.


To be continued......

Linking up with one of my favourite bloggers today.
I wish she lived closer.
So we could, like hang out.
Check her out here.

3 comments:

Gigi said...

Too funny!!

Heatherlyn said...

I always find inter-species interaction fascinating, myself.

Elaine A. said...

Oh my gosh, I'm laughing! I love to see how the different animals react to each other.

We were at friend's the other night and they have a dog, cat and an hairless RAT (eek). The dog and the rat were SO cute together. She just crawled all over the dog's back and he was cool with it. The cat was kind of a different story. :)

I wish you lived closer too, btw. You know, even the same country would be cool. ;)