March 15, 2009

Not Me! Monday

I am officially a "Mother of Two Kids who are on Spring Break". Say a prayer for me please and hope that we all come out of this week alive.

Here goes my Not Me's for another week.

I do not take only the red and orange ju jubes
out of the bag and leave the yucky yellow, green and black ones for everyone else to eat. Nope, not me!

My son did not tell a man missing his front tooth that he "lost a tooth" so loud that everyone in the hockey arena looked.

Not everyone in my town is missing a front tooth. Honest.

That same son also did not search under my friend's furniture for dirty socks and dishes. He also did not come and inform her everytime he found a "treasure".

I did not eat egg salad sandwiches for the last 4 days straight. Ewwwww.......

I do not enjoy watching the "all news" television channel. Only old people do that and I am so not old.

I also do not watch the weather channel because that is also for old people. Once again...I am not that old.

My wonderful obedient well-behaved dog did not eat some all-natural fertilizer. Like seriously. He would never do something so stupid. If you believe that, do not read this post...and this one.

I did not search Walmart's Easter section 4 times the other day in search of these. When they did not have them I was not sad. I mean, it is only chocolate and I am trying to lose 20 pounds. Really.

I do not take pictures of my kids covered in mud..(and ketchup....and chocolate) after riding their dirt bikes. It is mud Momma. Pulllease.

While on a playdate at a local gym I did not leave my van door wide open for 20 minutes before another mom came in and announced to the entire crowd that "someone left their door wide open".

I am not overwhelmed at times. I am Super Mom and nothing gets past me.

Click on the button below to view hundreds of Not Me posts. You wont regret it. Honest.

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Great-Full Mom said...

Your Not Me's cracked me up! I love the picture of your son - the ketchup looks like blood! Ha!

My son once saw a man with lots of dental work done, most of his teeth were silver. My son asked him how he got so lucky to grow silver teeth. I was soooo horrified I pretended like I didn't hear that comment while I pulled him away. Gotta love kids!


Emily said...

too funny! Love the picture. Your blog is hilarious and your kids are adorable!

pam said...

Nice to meet you Super Mom!! Great NMM!

Clair said...

Your son would never find any "treasures" under my sofa, nope not me!

Made me smile!

Staci said...

Great Not Me's! Why is it that my son looks like your son's picture all the time but he doesn't ride a dirt bike :) My son also saw a young boy (probably about 10 yeras old) in the grocery store the other day with a serious mohawk. I could see the comment about to come ripping out of his mouth at full volume and had to stop him quickly :)

Kati said...

Those are awesome! Your blog is fantastic. Thanks for stopping by mine! I look forward to reading more!

Wayne said...

I love egg salad sandwiches maybe not 4 days in a row but i do enjoy them. and I thought it was so funny that the boy shouted about the mans front tooth

Jen said...

Oh I am in the same boat, totally supermom here and nothing, I mean nothing gets by me, now where is the 3rd baby he has got to be around here some where.......

It Feels Like Chaos said...

Me neither, nope, never overwhelmed!!!

Heatherlyn said...

Hey, I like the weather channel!

Melissa said...

You have a beautiful blog, first time here...great NMM's. I have had very similar situations. Have a great week!