10

January 31, 2004, my second born came into this world in a huge rush.
He entered this life with such speed that the doctor missed it.
And since that day, this perfect creation has continued to live by his own schedule.
I love this kid so effing much that it hurts.

I could tell you everything I love about him, but that would take until next month, so, instead read this interview.
It's funny because he hated it so much.............

"Matthew, can I ask you a few questions?"
"No"
"It won't take long, I promise"
"OHHHHHH MOM, I HATE THESE THINGS!!!!!!"
"One day, you will thank me for doing all of this"
"No I won't"

"Whats your favourite colour?"
"Green" "TV Show" "Rick's Restoration. "Do you mean American Restoration?" "No" "Movie?"
"I don't know"
"Food?"
"Spaghetti and Hamburger Helper"
"Number?"
"1111"
"Why?"
"Because its all ones"

"If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?"
"Under the Sea"

"Who is the Prime Minister of Canada?"
"Marack Obama"
"President of the United States?"
"Marack Obama"
"Wow, he must be a busy guy"
"What makes you happy?"
"Going to sleep"
"Mad?"
"When Nicholas calls me names"
"Sad"
"When Nicholas copies me in a girl voice"

"Tell me one good thing about Dad"
"He buys me Tim Hortons hot chocolate"
"Tell me one good thing about Mom"
"She makes me Hamburger Helper"

"How tall do you think you will grow?"
6 foot 3

"Where will you go on your first date?"
"This is dumb"
"WHERE?????????????"
"A restaurant"
"What will you do there?"
"Give her a smooch"

"Who and what would you take with you if you were stranded on a desert island?"
"Food, water and Dad, because Dad knows about most stuff"

"Are you going to have kids one day?"
"Sure. Maybe 1"

"What do you own right now that you will keep forever?"
"A picture of my family"
"Why?"
"So I have memories"

"What kind of car will you drive when you're a grown up?"
"A Ford Super duty Diesel Doctor"
"Is that real?"
"YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"What part of being a grown up are you looking forward to the most?
"Being able to tell people what to do"

"What part are you a little afraid of?"
"Paying bills"

"Are we done now?"
"Yeah"   Happy birthday to my headstrong, handsome, smart, funny, athletic, affectionate 10 year old. *sniff*

Hosted by Cecily and Lolli

Looking for a silver lining.....

Dear Mother Nature.
Right now, I hate you.
Love Momma
*For the last 4-5 days, it has been around -20 degrees Celsius.  One day it felt like -35.  Do you realize how cold that is?
It is so cold that my boogers froze almost instantly.

*It's so cold that my piece of s^%$ vehicle wont start and hasn't started for almost 4 days.
I am a prisoner in my own home and I am about to lose my effing mind.

*My kids have had indoor recess at school for days which means they are going stir crazy, which means they are driving me to pull my hair out strand by strand.
True story.
I hid in the bathroom for a very long time yesterday pretending that I was experiencing a case of poop soup when really I just wanted to get away from the little shitheads fighting.

*The horses don't want to be outside.
There is bunny poop at every door to the house because I think the poor buggers are trying to break into the house during the night.
The cat{s} are nestled in the hay to keep themselves warm.
And I have a cough.

*The silver lining to this piece of crap weather???
Its so cold that Jersey the dog doesn't even want to run away.
And we can have an ice rink on our back field.




Dear Mother Nature
Maybe "hate" is a strong word.
I guess you're OK..
Love Momma

Hosted by Cecily and Lolli

Boys and dirt and I am the worst parent ever. Dont judge

Ya, so I have two boys.
OK, my husband had something to do with making them, but we haven't seen him in 10 days because he is working 15 hour days for 1 month straight.
So, as of right now I have two boys.
Do you know how effing hard it is to keep two boys busy? 
My daughter can go draw pictures of rainbows and unicorns for hours on end, but, my boys......they cling to me like bloodsucking leeches, not knowing what to do with themselves.
Or they fight.
Or they cling to me while fighting with each other and I have no way of getting away.

Hell.

So, recently I did what every expert parent would do.  I sent them across the road in the construction area where there is lots and lots and lots of mud and a selection of ginormous machinery.
So what.

I told them I would take pictures to document how lucky they are to have a mother who encourages them to play in the mud.
They totally fell for it.
And I enjoyed having my personal space back for just 10 minutes.


Confession.
When we saw a construction worker, I told the boys to get out of the mud before he saw us.
I had visions of the newspaper article about the "Mother and Children Arrested for Trespassing", so I totally pretended that they weren't allowed to be there.
Parent of the Year right here, folks.
Where is my award???
They were a tad confused.
I was a tad amused at myself for being such a terd, but whatever.

Instead, the boys popped wheelies in the driveway and made the best facial expressions I have ever seen in my life.

Like, really.
Have you ever seen anything so awesome?


Me neither.

Big Foot

I don't post anything for a few days and I lose a follower!
Geesh...the pressure to keep you guys happy is going to cause me to drink.
*cough*

Lets discuss feet.
I hate feet.
Baby feet I love.  I can touch, squeeze and even nibble on baby toes, but once those baby feet become stinky, boy feet, I don't want them anywhere near me please and thank you.

I believe God is punishing me for hating feet by giving my 8 year old, man-sized feet.

My feet----8 year old feet

 

The 8 year old wears a men's size 10 boot.

Hold me.

Not only does he have stinky, man-sized feet.

We now have to spend a frickin fortune buying his footwear every season.

 

I am losing sleep wondering if he will be a size 18 by the time he is a teenager.

Will we have to special order his footwear like rich basketball players do?

Except we aren't rich.

 

His boot----my shoe

 

Will he have to go out and get a job at the age of 9 to raise money for his Big Feet Fund?

Are kids going to tease him?

Or will they be terrified of him?

 

One thing I do know.

The girls will love him.

 

You know what they say about big feet.........

 

*snort*

Did I just say that?
 

Talking with my Kid

Can I interview you?
Why?

Because I want to.
You're weird.
Yes. Yes I am.
The jokes on you because I helped to make you which means you're weird too.  So there.
Like I said.  You are weird.
{my 8 year old already acts like an adult}

Favourite song?
Gangnam Style
Food?
Candy
Sport?
Soccer
TV Show?
Gator Boys.
What is it about?
They catch gators with just their hands and they have to go in the water to catch them.
What do they do when they catch them?
Bring them to a treatment place for them to do wrestling and stuff.

Dog?
Burmese Mountain Dog and German Shepherd.
That's good, because we have a German shepherd.
Do you love Jersey the dog?
Yeah
Does he annoy you?
Yeah
Why?
Ummmm, because he pees on the floor and bites me.
Favourite thing to do?
School
Why?
Because I play soccer at recess
Maybe you can join a team.
No. And don't write that because I'm not going to.
Just did. And you cant stop me.
Once again, you are weird.

Who's going to win the Presidential Election?
I don't even know what that it is.
Barack Obama or Mitt Romney?
Arack Obamaka
Good choice, son.
You're a smart kid.
I know.

Sharing

Item #1
Oldest child loves hats.
He also insists on acting like an old man while wearing one.

Item #2
I am a gardening failure this year.
My excuses-too hot, too dry and I hate weeding.
I deeply regret this behaviour and promise to do better next year.
Amen.

Item #3
Smokey the cat still nurses her 3+ month old kittens.
Is this weird?

Item #4
There is a freshly painted horse sleigh here.
We just need seats and snow.
And hubby needs a Santa suit.

Item #5
Middle child yells at me every time I take his picture without asking first.
I just say "Sorry. I will ask next time." and then we are all good.
But I never ask.
Because if I do, he gives me smiles like this.


Item #6
Hubby washed all of his finds from my Grandparents rickety shed.
Everything now sits in our brand new garage awaiting a place in the barn that he plans on renovating partly into a man cave/museum.

Item #7
Hubby purchased a barely used hole-free pond liner.
Why?
Because he wants ducks.
Hold me.
Ducks=coyote food=stressed out Momma

Item #8
The hat-wearer loves his new bike.
{he put his helmet on immediately after I snapped this}

Item #9
Ike and Duke love me more than anyone else in the world.

Item #10 Blackie the barn cat is pregnant.
I am so upset about this, I cant even talk about it.

Item #11
The corn across the street is over my head now.
I am always fascinated by how tall it gets.
And how scary it would be to get lost in a field full of corn.
Smokey likes to find mice over there.
And she always finds her way back.
Good thing, because I wouldn't go looking for her........

Item #12
Princess still wears her rubber boots on the wrong feet.I will never get tired of this.Ever. 

The View from Here 

Homestead Barn Hop