July 10, 2011


This is a post about poop.  This is a post about me pooping.  Don't judge.  We all do it.

When I am in different places, my system gets freaked out.
If I am somewhere unusual or new, my body reacts by telling me to find a bathroom fast.
Really fast.
Like before I crap my pants fast.
It really is some sort of cruel, psychological joke that my body likes to play on me and, to be quite honest, it ticks me off.

I must know where a bathroom is at all times because my worst fear is being somewhere different and not being near a bathroom.
It is normal for me to scope out the washroom before enjoying myself.
Once I know where the washroom is and know that I am close to it, I can relax (alittlebit).
But if I don't know where it is, my body senses that we are in foreign territory and in an "unsafe zone" so it freaks out.
And...well...you know.

It is totally shitty.
Pun intended.


Karen said...

Nobody's commented on this yet???

I feel your pain...I have IBS and it is greatly exacerbated by new situations. Even familiar situations that are not in the usual routine (i.e. family dinners). You should see when we drive to Florida...I don't eat the entire drive down (23 hours) because you just don't know.

And I've crapped my pants plenty. There, I said it.

Krista said...

Hmmm. I have the complete opposite problem. If I am anywhere other than my home, (even if I go home to the house I grew up in!), my system shuts down. For days on end. It's as though my inner body has some sort of sensory radar thing that tells it that we are in a strange environment. It's weird.

But I'm more sorry to hear about your problem, and kudos to you for being able to discuss it! I can't imagine what that must be like.

The Lovely One said...

This is so gross and funny! I love it!

I tend to save my poop for the privacy of my own bathroom-- which makes for difficult times when I'm on a week-long vacation!

Gigi said...

I have the same problem as Krista and The Lovely One; which is hugely problematic if we are gone for any length of time.

Minivan Mama said...

I'm a poop at home only kinda girl. Wow, I feel better with that off my chest! ; )

The Best of Both Worlds said...

Ahh this cracks me up cus I am also a poop at home only girl but something really upset my tummy the other night. We were in toys r us and I had to go. My husband won't stop making fun of me!