November 17, 2009

Stuff that isnt cool.

You know what isn't cool?
When a raccoon decides to greet me at my door as I stumbled out of my parents vehicle at 230am.

You know what else isn't cool?
When the same raccoon decides that a nice place to chill out the next day is on our deck.


And he stays for hours.




And even poops on our deck.

Right at the door.

Yeah. Um. If I wasn't an animal lover and wasn't scared to death of the bugger, I would have taken matters into my own hands.

You know what is cool?
When hubby comes home from work early and safely scares the raccoon away. Into our tree.

He stayed there for hours. The raccoon, not my hubby.


You know what isn't cool?
When I ask my child what he would like for lunch and he says "some ass". What.On.Earth am I supposed to think about that answer? I tell ya what I thought. Where are the 12+ drinks I had the other night so I can forget he just said that.

You know what wont be cool?
About 10 years from now when my boys date.


You know what also isn't cool?

When my boys refer to the "National Lampoon Christmas Vacation" movie as "The Sexy Lady Movie" and pause it at the sexy lady parts.



They are 5 and 7 years old.

I am scared.





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10 comments:

koreen (aka: winn) said...

LOL.
I love a good laugh in the morning. =)

Shana Putnam said...

I wonder if that raccoon is sick or something. It should not be that calm being so close to humans. Hmmm. The comment from your son cracked me up.

Otter Thomas said...

I love the racoon at the door. You should have called Cousin Eddie from the sexy lady movie. I think he eats those things.

Unknown said...

I'd be scared too... ; )

Heatherlyn said...

They aren't my kids so I can laugh and laugh!!!! :)

The only racoons I see around here are dead in the road. There must be a lot of them because I see lots of dead ones. Where are they living? At least, not on my back porch! I've heard they can even open unlocked doors!

Foursons said...

Bahahahaha! Love your boys comments although I know they aren't funny to you.

I'm thinking that raccoon is rabid. Raccoons don't normally hang out during daylight hours.

Only the Sheppards said...

I happened upon your blog looking for some assistance for my own "I-have-two-sons-related trichotillomania." Thanks for making me laugh. You'll now have another faithful follower!

Faith's Place said...

I just laughed out loud! Hilarious!

Grand Pooba said...

Oh my god, I would love to try some ass, it sounds interesting!

Scary Mommy said...

Yikes! 5 and 7!! Oy. I'm scared now- is that what I have to look forward to 2 years from now?!