I often struggle with how much I should discuss on this blog. When I began this a few years ago, I wanted it to be my therapy so I could survive raising young children.
I planned on sharing our lives.
The good, the bad and the ugly.
Because, deep down I know that we are not the only family out there going through "stuff". Everyone lives their life trying to get through everyday. Trying to survive.
And even though many writers write about their perfect days, most of us know that behind their doors, it really isn't perfect.
Now, as my children get older and our lives get more complicated, I am struggling trying to decide when to censor myself. Not because I am scared of what others will think, but because I don't want my children known around town as "The kids from that blog". I don't want them known as characters in a story.
They are unique individuals living their lives as authentic as they know...without any judgement or fear.
That is how I want it to stay.
So help me out here.
How do I continue writing about our lives freely?
Do you censor yourself?
Or do you allow your life to be an open book?
March 05, 2011
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10 comments:
For me personally I think about how I would feel if my mom had kept a blog. As an adult I would love to go back and read about her experience of raising me and my sisters. I think as long as you show them respect, it is ok.
I went through a similar crisis in January.....I now only include photos or mentions of my daughters with their permission. However I hope at some stage I will be able to include more of them again, and they will enjoy and appreciate the memories I have recorded.
The emphisis of my blog is definitely evolving....
I censor, censor, censor. I try to stay as anonymous as possible. No, my life isn't perfect. And I don't represent it as being so - but personally, I'd rather not have too much info out there.
I keep my blog pretty light hearted. But honestly I have an 11 year old daughter who is obviously very sensitive, but I have a ton of things I would love to write about. A preteen daughter and a mom have a very interesting relationship. I try to do my best not to say anything that would embarrass her. I am also thinking about doing some guest posting annonymously to help with my "writing urge" but avoid anyone in the neighborhood finding out.
I would love to hear how you find your balance.
It's a tough call, isn't it? I find I go back and forth between wanting to bare my soul and wanting to only share funny stuff. I take it day by day. We're lucky to have a huge support circle with a lot of love and respect for our boys, even when I call them The Gremlins and discuss tantrums. I do find that as Intrepid gets older (now 14), I don't share as many of his ups and downs anymore. If I say anything about him it's generally humorous, and nothing he wouldn't want his friends to read.
My children are still young, so maybe I have a few years to think about this. For now, I try to be an open book. However, I am trying not to let people in my real world know about my blog, so I don't think my kids would be known as "those kids from the blog" because no one would know they those kids.
I don't really censor myself, but I do limit how many people in my real life know about my blog.
When you are writing about other people, I think you have to consider the potential fallout if you write about them -- especially children. I do censor things as I'm not completely anonymous in my blogging. People from my husband's work read my blog sometimes and there are just things I don't want to share. I share a lot about my son but I'm sure that will change as he gets older (and I do ask him if it is OK). It can be a fine line and you have to ask yourself what is the purpose of what you are writing about and whether writing it is worth the possible outcomes. Good luck! It can be a difficult thing to figure out.
Always think about the person you're writing about. But if you censor, you aren't honest. Honesty is what makes blogging what it is.
I struggled with this a lot in the past six months. What I could and could not post on my blog. What I was afraid to post now that people close to me in my life knew about my blog & even read it. I was struggling with what to post.
I have realized that if I'm honest in my life, then I can be honest on my blog. I write about it all...while still struggling w/ how to keep that honesty everywhere. Some things still haven't made it on my blog - b/c confronting them in real life is more difficult that can be imagined...but I'm getting there.
That's a tough one. Because life is interesting. We have our bad days and our frustrating moments with family members but most of the time the moments are pretty wonderful. I have to be careful because extended family members read my blog and I don't want to say anything negative about them ... although let me tell you that if I did make posts about some of the crazies that I am related to or the super duper crazies who are our ex spouses that my blog would be a whole lot more interesting!!!! I know that I've written a few posts about some of the frustrations that I've had as a parent. And then I wonder ... what if somewhere somehow someday someone reads that post about my child and gets the wrong impression about them? It's a tough one! But I do think that most people know that you have a good sense of humor and that your family is really quite wonderful.
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