It was a doozy of a week. Doozy is my new favourite word.

OK, peeps.
Enough with the emails.
I am OK.  I am alive.
I have just been busy.
Busy=playing Candy Crush.
Whatever.

I have been stuck on level 147 for about 3295649367 days and am thisclose to deleting the game from all electronics in my home, but..... it just grabs me.  Gets a hold of my brain.  Convinces me that if I play just one more time, I will pass the level.

And then I don't.

And then I hate myself for playing it.
And go into a deep depression because there are so many other things I should be doing.

Anyways, this week has been a doozy on my very unstable mental health.

*  Jersey the dog had to go to the vet so we could pay her hundreds of dollars to tell us what we already knew.  He has an ear infection.  And he has licked his butt hole so much that it is now red and inflamed.

Why he licks his anus area, we don't know, but now we have to glove up and apply meds to his poop hole twice a day.

And he has to wear underwear.

Shoot me now.

* My family attended an Evening of Remembrance at the hospital that treated my Daddy last year. The pianist was the Palliative Care Doctor who told us that they had no other options for my Daddy and our time with him was going to end.

True story. I wanted to punch him in the face.

As the Chaplin talked about grief,  I wanted to scream.
Because, in my fragile state of mind I couldn't help but be angry that God took my dad at such a young age.

My young Mother was surrounded by widows and widowers probably 20+ years older.
My brother and I were placing a butterfly on a tree for a father who should be alive for another 20+ years.

Anyways.........

*  I got pulled over by a police officer the other night because I was driving without my lights on....at 930pm.
True story.  I rarely drive my husbands car at night.
My vehicle has automatic lights.  My husbands car does not.
True story.  I didn't even realize I was driving without the lights on....at 930pm.   Duh.

The nice police officer was a dear friend's husband. {thankeffinggawd}
Apparently I was {unknowingly} driving in the worst area of the city/town without my lights on at 930pm.
Suspicious, maybe?

True story.
It was just me.  A 37 year old mom of three, trying to take a shortcut home in a vehicle not driven often...without lights on.

Hold me.

*  Pumpkins and watermelons have been planted indoors and are awaiting the big day they get placed in the outdoor garden.

Today it is snowing.

Dear April.

You suck.

*  My husband and I are addicted to Dateline/48 Hours and 20/20.  Our evening entertainment involves marathons of true crime television.

I am waiting for the episode about the mother of three who drove through the seediest part of town with no lights on.

Ugh.

Hosted by Cecily and Lolli
 

How does my garden grow?

Well, I will tell you.
So far, so good.
But I hate weeds, and every morning when I check out my baby {aka garden}, I almost cry because the weeds are back.
Its like they have a meeting every night when I go inside and do the evil laugh because I just spent my afternoon pulling them out.
And then they all spend the night growing larger then they were before.

Do I put straw down in the rows between the veggie rows?
Do I hire people who enjoy weeding 24/7?
Do I just suck it up?

Anyways, here is the progress.

Grapes. Coming along nicely.


Kale. Awesome! But I know nothing about it. I am just determined to make kale chips. Someone tell me what I need to do so I dont have to Google it please and thank you.


Broccoli. Looks good so far but we didnt have any luck last year with it. Fingers crossed.


Tomatoes. Look at the flowers!!! Tomatoes arent far away!


Watermelon. Lookin good but we have never had success with them.


Squash. Yeah baby!!!


Cucumber. We always have lots of success with the cucs!!


Onions. Good, so far. As long as I dont pick them too early like I did last year!


Lettuce. Success!


Strawberries. There have been alot but they are very small, and we are lucky to get them before the critters.


Fruit trees. No sign of any fruit. This makes me very sad.


My plan over the next couple months?
To harvest the food that the weeds {and I} love so much.
Then set up a stand at the end of my driveway.
Wear my apron, Laura Ingalls bonnet and sell it all.
Maybe we can even get some chickens so I can sell the eggs.

Ok, maybe not.
But it would be good blog material right?

I am a country girl.
How the heck did this happen? FYI....I do not actually own a Laura Ingalls bonnet, just in case you were wondering.

What's Growing On???

Ohmygoodness, I crack myself up.
There is alot growing on around here.
*snort"

I love this time of the year. Don't you?
Aside from the fact that my back hurts and the inside of my house looks like a bomb hit it, I am quite happy with what I accomplished this week outside.
Stuff has been planted.
Stuff is growing.
See?

Before I know it, this garden will be full of yummy fruits and veggies.

I might even make Aunt Polly's pickles again.
Maybe even some homemade tomato sauce.
I might chop up my peppers so I can freeze them and use them throughout the winter.
Kale chips will be attempted.
And maybe even some of my grandma's famous icicle pickles.

I am most excited about the strawberries though.
Why?
Because my kids eat them constantly.
OK...me too.
With ice cream...and cake...and just about anything else.
Whatever.

Smokey the cat must be close to becoming a Momma. Then what do we do????
I am so scared she is going to birth many babies that we will then be responsible for.
I always thought it would be nifty to be a crazy cat lady, but never thought it would happen.
And never considered the cost involved.
Have I ever told you that we were told Smokey and Blackie were males when we went to pick up our barn kittens?
They are both females.If I didnt love them so much, I would take them back to the farm we got them from.

She is cute, but, man she wears thin at times.
She never shuts up.
She is bossy.
Demanding.
A total diva.Her favourite word is "cwap" aka "crap"and "penis".Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Good thing I love her so much.

Whats growin on at your house?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Gardening

As a child I never understood how people could enjoy gardening.
It is dirty.
It is a lot of work.
There are bugs and other pests.And, it interferes with my life.

To me, it just didn't make sense.
Until now.

Now I get excited about starting my garden every year.
I spend hours pulling weeds and tending to it like a baby.
Kinda.
I wear my apron and my rubber boots.
Sometimes I even garden barefoot which totally grosses my hubby out.
I just tell him "I am one with the Earth" whatever that means

Anyways, to fuel my love of gardening, is Pinterest.
If you have not joined that magnificent site, you are missing out hugely.
I have a board dedicated to gardening and I will actually search gardening stuff instead of cleaning my house or feeding my children....
...or showering....
...and brushing my teeth.

Don't judge.

The ideas I get from sites pinned on Pinterest get me so excited.  I want to have fancy container gardens throughout our property.    I want herbs.  I want a garden shed.  I want a rustic fence around my vegetable garden.  I want every possible garden tool out there. I want every single book. I want pretty gardening aprons and sun hats. I want to make relishes/jams/pickles/sauces until my cupboards are overflowing.

Um...yeah....basically I need 27 hours in a day and need to win a lottery.
Whatever.


Pallet Gardening
Garden Shed
Garden Lantern
Book
Garden Fence

This will be the year my friends. The year that I grow the largest tomato in the Universe. The year that I actually succeed at growing broccoli. The year that I open a veggie stand at the end of my driveway where I will sit in my rubber boots, apron and bonnet and sell my veggies to the locals. Maybe I could get chickens and sell the eggs too.And bees to sell the honey.
OK....I took it too far.

Are you on Pinterest?I am.Right here.Do you garden?Make pickles?Jams?
Any tips are appreciated muchly.
xo

Welcome Fall

It is here.
Fall. 
Autumn.
 The season before the season that causes me to dive into a serious depression and want to hide under the covers for months.
Damn it all, I hate winter.
I love fall, but knowing that we are that much closer to snow and freezing temperatures saddens me.
While I am hiding under the covers, I secretly dream about moving south so I never, ever have to start my vehicle in -30 degree (Celsius) weather again.
I dream about sun, sand, tanned skin and the smell of sunscreen.
Year round veggie gardens and fruit trees, walking barefoot and a swimming pool in my backyard.

Then I get out of bed and see mountains of snow.

Damn you winter!

For now, I will try my hardest to enjoy the fall season and appreciate all of the little things before it all freezes over and I am in a cold, dark Hell.

Signs of fall around the homestead.

The onions have been harvested.

The sunflowers are suffering

The tomato plants are drying out

The leaves are changing

The apples are ready

We have gourds

The sweaters are being worn.
Can I just get a Hallelujah that Princess is wearing a sweater (with shorts)? This is huge people. The fact that she is wearing anything other than a tank top is a monumental occasion not to go unnoticed.


Happy Fall.
I guess.

Go see Cecily for more photostory stuff

Random

Bonjour mon amis!
More random stuff because that's what I love to talk about.

*The kids are at their Grandmas for a sleepover.  This is the first time in 3+ years that I have been home for a night without children.  Can I get an Amen?

*We ate at Denny's tonight.  I think I gained 6 pounds.

*I am in love with The Bachelor Pad.
 Is it just me or does Kasey sound like Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs???????

*We have grapes!!!


*Potty training is going well.  I basically camp out in the washroom now so I can be on duty every five minutes

*Why does plucking your eyebrows make you tear up?

* Why am I getting random chin hairs?
   Aging sucks balls

*I get this look approximately 6400 times every single day

Feel sorry for me?

*I am sorry Princess.  You have inherited the dark under eye circles from your Momma

*The kids favourite song of the moment


That's all I got folks.

My therapist tells me to appreciate the smallest of successes. I am trying really hard.

Guys, I'm so sad.

Our garden this year is not doing so well.
It has been so hot and dry that we haven't had much luck producing alot of the vegetables I love so much.
Broccoli was a huge disaster.  I finally ended up pulling it all and throwing it into the compost pile.
Our beans.  We get like 4-5 a day.
Our cucumbers are long, skinny and wrinkly like old dried up...ummm.....you know.

Our tomatoes are OK but we didn't stake them early enough so they flopped over.
They are very small.
Just not how I like my tomatoes.
Although I have been making bruschetta every single day for lunch and it has been quite yummy, so I shouldn't really complain.
Size isn't everything I guess.
The carrots are small and odd shapes.
But the bunny likes them so I guess that's a good thing.
The onions are small but that's OK because I don't like them anyways.
Gardening successes are few.
I am trying to celebrate the small positives because my therapist says I should.

Green peppers.  We have so many, I have been giving them to random strangers who walk by our house.  I hate green peppers.
Zucchini.  They are huge and long.  Perfect.  Except I don't like zucchini.
Beets.  I even made beet relish.  I hate beets.
Green onions.  Anyone want some?  I hate the buggers.
Acorn squash.  I have eaten so much of it that when I think of eating more, it makes me ill to my stomach.
And sunflowers.  WTF do I do with sunflowers other than take a few pictures and put them in a vase?

Do you have a garden?
Has it been a good year or craptastic year?
Anyone want some sunflowers?Remind me next year to plant stuff I actually eat.Thanks muchly.



Go see Kailani for more Aloha Friday questions.


Go see Cecily for more Photostory Friday stuff

15 Things You Don't Know About Me..Until Now...Because I'm Going to Tell You

I spend alot of time talking about myself...my kids...my hubby....my animals....my life.
Sometimes I think I started blogging just so I could talk about myself but I really didn't.  Honest.  The talking about myself just kinda happened.
Sorry.
Some bloggers are crafty, great cooks or fashion divas, but me....I just talk about...umm....me.

And tonight as I sit here watching the Bachelorette, I feel the need to share things about myself that not everyone knows.
Consider yourself part of my inner circle.
Even if you don't want to be.

1.  I eat bananas on my eggs.  Yep.  Really.  Fry an egg.  Slice up a banana. Drop slices on egg and soak it all up in runny yolk.  There is nothing better.

2.  Sometimes I do my gardening barefoot.  I say it is because I want to be "One with the Earth", but really it is just easier than getting dirt in my shoes.

And yes, I scrub my feet clean when I am done.


3.  I call Studley "Boob" or "Boobie".  Why?  I don't know.  But he listens.......


4.  I wear a mouthpiece to bed.  It is sexy.  I have ground my teeth so much that you can now see down inside my bottom teeth.  My dentist even told me that it is the worst case of "teeth grinding" she has ever seen.  I asked her to take a picture and do up a story about it.........

I'm a hawt sexy Momma. 

If you are a robber and come into my house, be prepared to be greeted by a Momma with a huge contraption in her mouth with drool hanging out.
Its sexy.

5.  I hate beer.

6.  And red wine.

7.  I miss my Grandpa.  After burying him this weekend, it all became final and I realized that life at my favourite place in the world will never be the same without him.

And, my Grandma will never be the same without him.

That makes me horribly ill to my stomach.

8.  I {not so secretly} dream of the day that we can live on this lake.


9.  I would rather pay for a foot massage than a full body massage.  Why do I love it so much???

10.  I never book a vacation or any sort of reservations online.  I will make the effort to use the telephone so I can talk to a human being and have my questions answered.

11.  I never use the self check out at stores.

12.  I have alot of freckles in one armpit but none in the other.  Weird.

13.  I say "Wow" alot.  Too much actually.

14.  I still know all of the words to Eternal Flame by The Bangles.  You're jealous, I know.

15.  I have an addiction to Pinterest that is interfering with the rest of my life.  Why do people continually think of genius ideas that suck up my precious time?  And why cant I think of stuff like that and become a gazilliionaire so I can pay someone to watch my kids???

To be continued....when I am in the mood. 

Go see more WW here.  She talks about herself too.